Thursday, December 15, 2005

As If I Needed ANOTHER Reason NOT To Clean

I'm really not a materialistic person. I love designer everythings, but I'm also A-OK with Target, WalMart, etc... This comes in handy seeing as how we are not made of Designer Money.

That is not to say, however, that material things are not important to me. Our house, for example, is of great importance. The "right" neighborhood, the "right" schools, the "right" lawns...all of it was major in our ultimate decision. But jewelry? C'mon...

As it turns out, apparently I am tied to my jewelry; namely, my wedding ring.
I discovered this unknown tidbit about myself last night as I was *grrr* cleaning the kitchen. I was innocently putting away a jar of spice when the metal over-hang vent-holder- thing above the stove ATTACKED my ring and flung one of the diamonds into the nether-regions of my kitchen. I can't even think the "K" word without being filled with venomous hatred.

Right away, I had that sinking, "I'm going-to-puke" feeling that people are always talking about. That was a nice little treat. I quickly screamed for Shawn's help, tears brimming as we moved the stove, the fridge, destroyed cabinetry, etc... all in the quest to find the missing gem.

Ryan quickly asked the question all of you are most likely wondering: "What the hell is the big deal?? It's just a freakin' ring!" Okay, maybe she didn't use those words, but humor me please.

I have never never never been attached to my personal belongings. Never. Well, except maybe for my Volvo station wagon in High School, but can you blame me? ( I rocked the Ha Ha) Anyway, the surge of overwhelming sadness I felt was monumentally shocking to me. I couldn't figure out why this was effecting me so strongly.

Turns out, I'm a sentimental pussycat. Turns out, the fact that the diamonds came from a ring my grandmother left me when she passed away really is meaningful to me. Turns out, I really was touched when my Dad took Shawn, ring design in hand, to the jeweler to have it set. Turns out the Grinch has a heart...

I didn't go into this speech with Ryan, but I think she got the gist:

"Don't worry Mommy. We'll find it. It'll be okay. Here, I'll sing you a song. It's called, 'My Mommy Always Finds Her Ring'."

That made me feel much better, by the way.

Anyway, diamond is still MIA, ring is sitting lonely and forlorn in jewelry box (I cannot bring myself to wear it), and ring finger is merely adorned with lone wedding band, which was the way it started -- yep, we pretty much do everything in reverse here: baby, courthouse (James Avery 's $36 band was all we could afford), church wedding, pretty diamond ring. Rest assured, I am aware that all is not lost, unless Shawn's forecast turns out to be true: "So does this mean our marriage is going to fall apart now??" Bah Dah Bum.

Does he know how to make a girl feel better or what?

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