1 Working Daddy
1 4 yr old Goddess
1 1 yr old Fireball
1 Dozen Donuts
1 Set of Grandparents
1 pool (w/waterslide)
Begin by waking up SAHM 30 minutes later than normal with grandparents delivering dozen donuts for kids.
Wake up kids, eat donuts, visit with grandparents.
Send grandparents on their way, send Fireball to bed for morning nap, let sleep 2 hours.
While Fireball sleeps, set Goddess in front of TV to stew while using SAHM to mop the floors and clean children's playroom.
Take Fireball out of bed, stuff Goddess and Fireball with more donuts, dress in swim gear, set aside.
Drive to pool, soak up sun, swim, slide down water slide, cheer multiple times when Goddess does same By HERSELF. Total outdoor play will last 2 hours, during which not even your spotted mystic tan will manage to bum you out.
Pack up car, drive Goddess and Fireball home, re-stuff with donuts, set aside for 2 hour nap until Working Daddy returns to shouts of joy and peals of laughter.
I am now watching Bravo's 100 Funniest Movies, drinking Shiraz on the couch in my soanking-clean living room, surfing the internet in blissful, blissful SILENCE.
Walter Drummond by Ree
4 days ago