Having problems fasting? Come on over to OUR house!! I've developed a three-pronged plan to ease the pain of fasting on this beautiful Ash Wednesday...follow me!
1. First, I'd like to introduce you to my projectile-vomitting son, who has opted to up-chuck during the middle of the night over the past two days, and although the actual regurgitation took place hours ago, there is still plenty of DNA remains soaked into the carpet to help suppress your appetite. And if that doesn't work, ask me to tell you about how as soon as the puke hit the floor, Lola was right there to start licking it up. (See, I told you this would be easy!)
2. It's pretty hard to eat when there's no food in the house, unless you think a snack of peanut butter and ground flaxseed mixed with syrup would be a tasty treat. Actually...
3. And even if there were an abundance of food, there are no clean dishes or cookware to eat or cook with! It just goes to show, if you wait long enough, what initially appears to be a fault can eventually turn into blessing!!
Now go in peace to love and serve the Lord. Amen.