So here are some things I've caught myself saying lately:
"Tell me again why you had to cut open Ariel's chest...?"
"Get off your brother!"
"Are you coloring on my couch?"
"Don't throw the ball at the dog!!"
"Are you coloring on my table?"
"We do NOT throw poop -- do you hear me?"
"Sometimes Mommies yell. You just have to get over it."
"Are you coloring on my library book?"
"Don't bather the doggy unless you ask first, and we don't bathe her with cottonballs, okay?"
"I love you, too."
Oh the joy...
P.S. Taking bets on whether or not the "colored on my library book" will lead to another rousing episode of Amy vs. Ye Olde Evil Librarian. The odds aren't looking good for Amy. I'll keep you posted...