Let's talk scales, people.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how bad do you think it is for a mother to spend the majority of her day hiding from her kids, particularly her 18 month old son? And any time not spent hiding out is instead spent yelling, crying, rubbing her temples, and fantasizing about hiding out?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how annoyed would you be if everytime you turned around your 18 month old was throwing something, turning something over, spilling something, dunking something or breaking something? At time of print, he has emptied the entire contents of my tupperware cupboard, pulled down 3/4 of our Haolloween decorations, turned over his bowl of oatmeal, thrown a roll of toilet paper into the toilet, dumped over 2 drinks (neither belonging to him), and broken one candle votive. Perhaps we should make that scale 1 to 20.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how irritating would it be to have to choose between letting your kids scream and yell and fight with each other OVER hearing them scream and yell about not being able to play with each other?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how depressing is it that Ryan has taken to walking outside around the corner of the house in order to talk to me through the open window, because apparently I am just that scary?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how pissed would you be to learn that just 3 days after reaching your savings goal, you found out you were going to have to pay a pest company more than half of that amount to take care of the rat problem that you paid $350 to fix 2 years ago?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how lame are my creative abilities that my 4 yr old daughter begged me to purchase her an actual Dorothy wig, rather than have to wear the one I made, stating, "the one you made is kind of funky. I don't want the kids to laugh at me" ?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how elated am I that tonight is leftover night, and how much guilt will I sooo not feel when Shawn starts pissing and moaning about having to eat re-heated food?
Ona scale of 1 to 10, how happy are you NOT to be me today??
Like a waterfall in slow motion, Part One
2 years ago
2 comments:
Hey, at least no one was poking around in your nether regions and exclaimed: "Hey, there's something in there!"
See, you've got that going for you.
Oh, I just heard a loud thump upstairs, and I am avoiding my children right now, by writing to you. Love you madly!!
Hey it can't be that bad...your computer is still working, right?
Just blog browsing from Crazy Hip Blog Mamas...fun Blog you have here!
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